It is so frustrating…

…to see the in-laws sitting on the sofa, with their hands folded, face blown up like a balloon when you open the door, after returning from long tiring day of work and they see you and just ignore you and turn the face to other day. Then the lovely MIL will just get up from sofa & go to the balcony & stand there to ignore us…

Then you freshen up and give the gifts to your Mum in law which you have bought for her to give to her relatives hoping she will be happy but no reaction on that as well.. you tell everyone that you have bought new coffee sachets and let us all try these.. there are 5 people at home & unfortunately you only have 4 sachets..  Even before you make that coffee, MIL says she also wants the same plenty of sachets to bring them back to India.. You happily ask BIL to buy that from downstairs & then Mil adds she wants chips and other stuff as well to eat right now.. BIL goes and buy big box of 20 sachets instead of small one, lots of chips for her.. still the face is blown like a balloon..

Then you go to the kitchen to see that you have to prepare dinner & tomorrow’s lunch as well.. when everyone says they had snacks & coffee & not to prepare dinner just prepare tomorrow’s lunch for everyone..  You prepare lunch, aroma is so nice that you want to eat it.. but you cannot as no one is eating it because they had coffee & snacks but hey!! I did not had anything since evening.. You go back to accompany the family who is watching TV, but MIL again stands up and goes away in the balcony.. then you don’t have any other choice left than going back to your room and sleep empty stomach..

This is going on since last three days.. Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday, not sure what will happen today.. but one thing is for sure if they are not talking to PK & I, we are also not going to ask them what happened to them or why their mood is not good!! We are behaving as normal. Their behaviour with BIL is totally different.. so it is just PK & I who are been targeted by them without any reason.. PK is saying that if we have not done anything wrong then we should not worry but I just don’t like to return back from work to see their faces like this!!

I don’t know which parents behave like this with their kids?? Is it because their purpose of coming here, eating all different food, going all around Sydney & buying gifts & all that is solved now they have started behaving like this?? Sitting at home all day, instead of helping us they help their mind to think all negative things about us, I am not asking them to do all chores but at least don’t behave like this..

Long weekend is coming up here, everyone is going to work from home tomorrow to get even more long weekend, I also want to but too scared to sit at home with them..  They are already saying they don’t want to go anywhere and I am already seeing a big tornado coming at my home this weekend..

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29 Responses to It is so frustrating…

  1. Dhivya says:

    Hugs to you TP. I know how horrible it can to come back home from work and see horrible stuck up faces. I would suggest only one thing. Please NEVER EVER compromise on your food for others. Why are you spoiling your health just because they are not eating. Your stomach is different from theirs. So please eat and sleep.

    Dont look for an explanation on why they are behaving like this. Just ignore them. I think they are leaving in a week right. So start counting down the days to your freedom. Tight hugs to you get over all this.

  2. Oh dear, I am so sorry to hear this..Why are they behaving like ths to you and PK? Are they unhappy about something? Or they don’t want to go back?
    How could you even think of going to bed with no food, you and PK eat dinner even if they don’t want.
    I hope you feel better soon..tight hugs..

  3. chipmunk says:

    dai, they ate right, did they thought anything about you or PK, No right, then why you worry girl, sit in the kitchen table and eat what you want, never worry for anything. see its your life, you are shedding your sweat coz you want to live happy. These are kind of dramas, they are going to start right, so any patch up way to postpone the time. things will heel, ask PK about the reason why they behave like this. If you don’t ask that will be a volcano, that my son didn’t care ba bla bla. like it or not, ask them why they are like this. Our task is to ask nothing other than that. they reply or not leave it, but later they must not pinpoint you or PK that you never cared. hoping for the things to subsidies soon.

  4. Smita says:

    Been reading your blog for quite some time…

    A little bit of unsolicited advice…confront them and finish the issue, instead of being scared of entering your own home because of the negative atmosphere it is always better to speak out even if the fault is not yours. I have been thru a similar situation with my FIL and like u I used to avoid talking about it and it always increased the tension now I discuss it and get done with it…it is best for all…
    And why did u miss dinner? U were hungry so u shud have eaten…we women sacrifice on this small useless things and the in laws take us for granted….

    Cheer up 🙂

    • Hey Smita..

      If we confront them, they will pick out our silly mistakes..PK knows how to deal with her Mum, so he suggested if we don’t ask anything that will be better.. Not that there is our fault but everytime we meet they point out our mistakes & then don’t to us.. we are tired of these same issues happening again & again..

      Thanks Smita for your support & advise 🙂

  5. Visha says:

    why did you go to bed on empty stomach? You could have asked PK to give you company while you ate something in the kitchen itself.
    I can understand its very difficult to live in a place where the other person is not talking and ignoring you. But since you have done no wrong, I see no reason for you to feel sad. Talk to PK like you usually would, no matter who listens or not.
    When you come back tired from office, cant you ask your MIL to help you out in the kitchen by cutting and chopping the veggies? Try na..she cant refuse a straightforward request saying I dont want to help u..

    • She just goes and sits on sofa saying her head is hurting or goes away in her room & all that.. so that I cannot even ask for any help.. but surely when I have started cooking she will come and ask recipes!!

      But thanks for your support Visha.. just counting days until they return..

  6. sjscribbles says:

    TPL – I know it hurts – but try not to bother ? When are their return tickets booked ?
    What PK says is right – if you know you haven’t done anything wrong then just do not bother ok.
    Just let them be and do not get scared of any tornado coming. Be brave – you have PK with you.
    Do not sleep hungry – if their behavior is like this that is their problem and not yours!
    Phewww..Hugs Dear !

  7. Sujatha says:

    I can understand the mental trauma you face when ur in-laws are not responding to u but just ignore them.. Talk with PK a lot and u b urself..
    I know how hard it is t face such rude behaviour after a tiring day.. Calm down and relax urself.. Dont take all these things to ur mind..
    And its very bad to sleep with an empty stomach.. u can very well ask ur hubby to give company and have a nice dinner..
    This phase will pass on soon… Just count the days for their departure 🙂

  8. Jay says:

    How I wish I could hug you dear! The ballooned face and silent treatment for no apparent reason was something I went through too. Just hang in there and please don’t go to bed empty stomach. Remember, it is your house and your food-no need to feel out of place to eat even if the rest did not.

    • Oh dear..I am sorry it happened with you as well..
      then you can understand it is not simple to take your dinner plate and eat in front of those eyes staring at you 😦

      • Jay says:

        In my case, they would simply turn their head the other way. I was non existent, you see. It didn’t help I was staying in their house.

      • I have faced that also..
        but frankly speaking I am more comfortable while this is happening at my own home.. it becomes a burden if we are staying with them and they are not talking to us.. it is like being an unwanted guest or someone extra in their home!!

  9. diatriblog says:

    I agree with all these replies. Why are you sacrificing your food for them? Act as though nothing is amiss and go about your routine life. The best way to deal with such situations is to act as if you’re unaffected by it all!

  10. Jazz says:

    Oh TP. Don’t go empty stomach dear, you are so stressed, eat well atleast. And PK is right, don’t worry and try to cheer yourself up elsewhere, don’t expect anything from them. And also don’t try and ask what is bothering them, why bother when they are not caring. Just go with the flow, it is only few more days. After that, you and PK can have ‘chain ki saans’.

    • arey so waiting for that “chain ki saans”
      It is so uncomfortable jazz to constantly have eyes on you while eating.. it is better not to eat then 😦

      • Jazz says:

        Hmm I can understand TP. Better eat well outside only, meet PK outside and have fun and accept their balloon faces, what can you guys do if they don’t want to be happy, leave them to their self. Even PK must be embarrassed seeing such behavior of his own parents. 😐

      • We sometimes think that we can eat outside but you know the feelings that our parents are sitting at home & we go out and eat alone does not let us do that as well 😦

        yday night Pk said the same thing that he is embarrassed of his parents.. I can understand him but we are left with no choice..

        PK & I promised each other that we will make their trip memorable but if they themselves want to create issues we can’t do much na..

      • Jazz says:

        Ya it is not always rosy na, try not to think too much about them TP (maybe they are bored or whatever but this particular behavior towards just both of you is very bad) and you and PK just keep your cool, stay happy together.

        One incident I remember is, when my parents visited us in Chennai where me and Ims worked, my Mom was so bored and frustrated with the weather and not knowing the language and there was power cut one whole day and no water and she was super pissed and called me and cried, poor her, I felt so sad and took them out for weekend and she was so glad seeing the huge malls and shopping and eating out and all. 🙂

      • yeah thanks jazz.. trying be cool.. really..
        Oh no.. poor Mom.. but good that she enjoyed during weekend 🙂

  11. Pingback: The tornado came… | tandooripanipurilife

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